Marriage, Menopause & Manners: Dear Abby’s Spa Sense

dear abby

Pauline Phillips aka Dear Abby (image

Today I read that Dear Abby passed away at age 94.  If you don’t know who that is, nee Pauline Phillips, she wrote a syndicated advice column under the pseudonym Abigail Van Buren.  It got me to thinking about if she had ever encountered any spa etiquette questions.  Turns out, she, the genius she was, found ways to use spa for the good of her readers.  Here are a few gems and please rest in peace Dear Abby – you are a mentor to us all.


On taking a hairy friend to a spa:

Dear Abby told a gal that if she didn’t have the nerve to tell her friend she was overly hairy, to take her for a girl’s spa day, so a professional could.

Ironically, several male readers then wrote in and said they didn’t like it when women paid too much attention to appearances.

On getting men to understand hot flashes:

Dear Abby advised a lady who’s hubby didn’t understand hot flashes to invite her husband to a spa for a day of couples pampering. Upon her invitation to the sauna, he was loving it. When he was really feeling the heat, she suggested a snuggle.

His reply was less than encouraging as he was quick to let her know he felt too hot and sweaty. That was her cue to point out: that’s what it feels like for her to have a hot flash. Since that time her husband gives her space and even offers a cool glass of water and a cold cloth when she’s having a flash.

On massage helping marriages:

A reader wrote in and told Abby that evening DIY massages improved their marriage.

Do you agree with her advice above?  Dish below!  Spa ya later, Candy


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